Writing my graduation thesis was not easy for me. I was not very good at writing, even in Japanese. Looking back, I realize that although I liked English, I was not especially interested in literature itself. It may seem natural that I chose the English literature department simply because I liked English.
Because I had been attending church regularly, I came to understand the meaning of “sin,” which is the main theme of The Scarlet Letter. Thanks to this, I somehow managed to write my thesis. I did my very best, but I was not confident about either the content or my writing. To be honest, and rather embarrassingly, I had read only half of the original English text. I relied mostly on the Japanese translation. Still, I think I was able to write a fairly good summary in English.
Then the day of the oral examination arrived. Since it was my first experience, I was extremely nervous. I kept wondering what kind of questions I would be asked and what would happen if they questioned me deeply. Before leaving home, I prayed to Jesus:
“Jesus, I did my best on my thesis, but I have no confidence. Please help me avoid difficult questions.” It was, admittedly, a very selfish prayer.
We had to sit outside the classroom and wait for our turn. The students three before me and just before me had also written on Hawthorne, and their examinations took a long time. I became even more anxious and thought, What if I am questioned for over thirty minutes?
Finally, it was my turn. The professor in charge and the head of the literature department were seated there. For some reason, they asked me only two or three simple questions.
Then the professor in charge said, “You have written very well about sin. Are you a Christian?”
I told him that not understanding sin had led me to attend church, and that I was later baptized and became a Christian. He smiled and said, “That is a blessing, isn’t it?”
I did not know whether he himself was a Christian.
The other professor was also a local pastor, so I went on to explain in detail how I was baptized and how the pain in my stomach disappeared afterward. (I may be the only person who ever gave a personal testimony during an oral examination.) However, he gave a slight smile that felt dismissive. I was shocked, because it seemed as if he was thinking, How foolish. I could not understand why a pastor could not accept something wonderful that God had done.
Later, the professor in charge asked me, “Did you read the entire original text?” I answered honestly, “No. It was too difficult, and I read only half of it.”
He seemed to have already known this, but he did not get angry. My oral examination ended in what felt like about ten minutes, almost like casual conversation. (It may have been longer, but it felt very short to me.)
I was amazed. Even though my prayer had been so selfish, Jesus had answered it. My final grade was B. Hallelujah!
にほんブログ村
にほんブログ村
多言語学習ランキング
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